Managing Anxiety in the Transition Back to School
Child Therapy is in demand as kids go back to school in Montgomery County, MD.
Why? Kids are nervous about the transition. And so are parents. Parents might be more nervous, actually.
Our public schools are reopening their doors to students next week. Not all students are going back. But all students have feelings about it.
Some are switching teachers. Or taking an earlier bus than usual. There will be masks. And friends will be in other pods or on other schedules.
There is a lot that’s new. And for parents too. Parents will be tracking new forms and information and shifting schedules to keep up.
The good news is that we have done this before. No, not exactly this. But the same process. In fact, we have adjusted to the unexpected over and over again this year.
We’re getting pretty good at it. And our kids have made adjustments too. They have waited for vacations and birthday parties and school plays to happen again. They have gotten used to following new sets of rules.
So why are we nervous? We don’t like these new rules. We’re having an “I don’t want to!” reaction, before settling into the knowledge that we have to.
Here are our recommendations for getting back in touch with your own competence. And helping your kids find their confidence too.
Practical Support for Your Child’s Anxiety
Last spring we wrote about keeping the pandemic in perspective. The post featured a strategy of making a life timeline. This tool can be immensely helpful for tracking how we’ve overcome past challenges.
Revisit it here. This time, be sure to put some dots on the timeline for times when your child faced a new environment. A new house, school, or activity. Even a vacation to a place where the rules were different. Or adjusting to the rules of the pandemic!
Going back to school this spring is one of these times. It might be the same old building (or not) with a different classroom, teacher, and routines. How did you handle it before? Did the new feel normal after a while?
Also highlight some times when things didn’t go as expected. Plans changed. Friendships changed.
These might not be major enough to warrant a dot on the timeline. But they are examples of times when your child needed to think flexibly. And that skill will help now, too.
For children who are especially anxious or rely on routines for comfort, you may want to have an extra conversation with the teacher about the school routine. Let the teacher know what calms your child when she’s anxious. Find out a few more details about the day and the classroom so you and your child can draw a picture or make a visual schedule.
(Will there be plexiglass barriers? Tape lines on the floor? What will the rules be for materials and for social times? When will there be time to go outside?)
And then plan for surprises. There are familiar surprises in school. Fire drills. Sudden announcements. A change in schedule because of a teacher absence.
Have your child think back to times when he handled these kinds of surprises before. What did he do? Did it turn out ok? Could he do those things again when he goes back to school? When things didn’t go as expected
What if I don’t have the answers? Here’s what our Child Therapists suggest
There are several things you can do, even when the future is uncertain. These are great strategies for questions like “Will we have regular school in the fall?” and “Will I get to have graduation?” Or “can I go on playdates when school is open again?”
Ask someone (or a website) who might know. And search or listen for answers.
Focus on the parts that you do know. For example “we know that the school is really trying to make that happen. We just don’t know quite yet.” Or “we plan to follow your doctor’s advice about that.”
Keep the anxiety at bay by doing more of what you love.
These sound like options on a menu. But actually you need to do all 3. Together they are a healthy way to cope with uncertainty.
And if the anxiety is increasing rather than decreasing over time, reach out for help. Our expert Child Therapists, Play Therapists, and Family Counselors can help you find the most practical solutions for your family.
