What is parenting burnout?

Parenting burnout is a state of exhaustion. You might feel it physically, mentally, emotionally, or all three. It comes from experiencing prolonged and overwhelming stress. We call it “parenting burnout” when the stress is related to your parenting responsibilities. And it affects your parenting.

Parents of neurodivergent kids and anxious kids are more at risk

That’s no surprise. You’re not just a parent. You are your child’s advocate, resource researcher, IEP enforcer. You might even feel like their therapist. Those jobs get harder to do when you’re burning out.

When your child is neurodivergent, you also have fewer people to turn to for support. Other parents may not understand your parenting experience. Babysitters, schools, and camps that can handle your child’s needs are harder to find.

Are you burnt out? How can you tell?

Burnout leaves you feeling overwhelmed, drained, and emotionally depleted. While still facing the parenting demands and challenges that depleted you. You feel like every day is a struggle. You’re going through the motions without much joy or enthusiasm. You start doubting whether you’re a good enough parent. You might be experiencing parenting burnout if

• spending time with your kids isn’t fun anymore

• you have too much responsibility and too little help

• there’s not enough time to do the things you enjoy or that help you recharge

• you’re losing patience. you get upset or angry more easily than you used to.

• you feel like you’re not doing enough, even if parenting is taking up all of your time

• you’re becoming more anxious than you used to be

A little more support could make a big difference.

Parenting is tiring. It rarely goes according to plan. And even if you aren’t burnt out, you likely aren't getting enough of the things that recharge your batteries. When you don’t get enough down time or support, your risk of parenting burnout increases.

Ways to Boost Your Parenting Resilience

Team up with your parenting partner or support system to create more time for the things that keep you going strong.

1. Find your personal self care strategies.  Exercise, mindfulness practice, and getting enough sleep are helpful for almost anyone. But only you know what works well for YOU. 

2. Make time for the activities you truly enjoy.  Create art.  Play an instrument.  Bake.  Play games.  Doing these things keeps you in touch with other sides of yourself (not just the parent).

3. Start a gratitude journal.  Turning your focus to what's going well can help you enjoy the good that comes between the struggles. 

4. Take breaks.  Talk with your parenting partner about giving each of you "off duty" hours every week.  Let your partner handle the parenting alone while you do whatever you'd like.

5. Give your kids more responsibility.  Consider what they could handle themselves (packing lunch? folding towels?) and hand it over!

Recover from Parenting Burnout

You're struggling with too much responsibility and too little help. You're carrying so much of the parenting load that you don't have enough time to recharge your batteries. If you think you might be burnt out, try these steps to start the recovery process.

1. Start with the physical or spiritual. Take a walk, stretch, or meditate for 5 min. every day.   

2. Consider who you could trust to step in and give you a break.  If you have a parenting partner, it's time to let them know you're struggling and ask them to step up.  Start a carpool or child care swap with another family or shift the bedtime schedule to give yourself some off-duty time.  

3. Connect with more people who are good supportive listeners. A parenting class or group can be a great place to find people who understand.  Scroll down to read about ours!

4. Consider giving your kids more responsibility. Think about what they could handle themselves (packing lunch? folding towels?) and hand it over!

5. If you're having thoughts of suicide or considering harming someone else, don't wait.  Call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 9-8-8 for immediate help.  

Are you ready to meet your best self? Start by meeting our Maryland Therapists, in our Kensington office or online.

We can help you:

• Relieve anxiety and stress.

• Heal after divorce/separation, loss, and transition.

• Manage difficult relationships.

• Set boundaries and priorities.

• Navigate life with ADHD.

• Understand yourself, your child, and your partner.

• Trade old patterns for newer, healthier ones.

• Feel more joy.