The Importance of Self-Care for Parents: Nurturing Yourself to Nurture Others
“I’m tired. I’m overwhelmed. I can’t. I don’t have the time.” Sound familiar? I totally get it. Stress and worry have a way of making themselves comfortable and cozy in our bodies and brains. Everyone is stressed, especially as a parent or caregiver.
Your capacity to care for others depends significantly on how well you take care of yourself. Self-care for parents is absolutely essential, not just for your own well-being, but also for the well-being of your children and the overall family dynamic. Here are our tips for keeping your self care cup full.
In essence, YOU CANNOT POUR FROM AN EMPTY CUP. (I wanted to make sure I got your attention). Just like you can’t drive without gas or a charge, you can’t give what you don’t have. Is your tank empty? Nurturing yourself is necessary.
When we don’t take care of ourselves as parents, the phrases at the top may run rampant in our minds and even spiral out of control leaving us feeling anxious, depressed and not good enough.
Parenting is one of the hardest jobs on earth. And I know how guilt can set in when you choose to take time for yourself. (Visualize guilt floating away on a cloud. Bye bye.)
When you prioritize your own well-being, you're better equipped to give love, support, and energy to those around you. You deserve to feel your best emotionally, physically and spiritually.
Self-care means taking time to fill your cup so that you can live a quality life, mentally, physically and spiritually. Don’t look for quick fixes, look for long term results: Willingness + Ability = Sustainability.
Are you WILLING to do what it takes to change your life? AND are you ABLE? Is it within reach? Take small steps that add up to SUSTAINED fulfillment in your life. Let’s learn how small nurturing acts of self-care in your daily life can make a big impact.
Self Care for Neurodivergent Parents, or Parents of Neurospicy Kids
It can be especially tough to fit in self care when you’re hyperfocused on something else. Or bouncing along after your neurospicy kids. Setting alarms on your phone can remind you to take a break. When it’s break time, remember this:
Parents, your emotional wellness matters.
Did you ever hear the saying, “you're only as happy as your saddest child?” It's hard to separate your feelings from your child's feelings. Waiting for your child to be happy again can delay you seeking happiness. This is where the guilt sneaks in. You find yourself denying your happiness and placing it into your child's hands. Waiting for them to experience success and joy is risky. It can leave you unfulfilled and place a burden on your child.
Give yourself permission to take care of yourself. Put your oxygen mask on first.
Parents can better help their children when they first take care of themselves.
Nurture yourself by scheduling in things you enjoy. Set a weekly date with yourself and keep the appointment.
Build your support system of trusted loved ones who you can depend on to fill your cup, not deplete it.
Set boundaries with work demands to reduce emotional stress. (Like not working through your lunch break.) Take a break, get some fresh air, take a mindful moment with a deep breathing exercise.
This not only helps you stay regulated in the face of challenges but it also teaches your children the importance of self-care. It creates a safe space for your children to express their feelings openly and find their way back to a regulated state.
Parents, your physical wellness matters
Nurture yourself with physical activities. When you move your body, it's like applying soothing lotion to your bones and joints. Believe it or not, it also reduces stress, aches and pains and increases the feel good endorphins in your brain.
Nurturing your physical health through exercise, nutritious meals, and adequate sleep directly impacts your energy levels, mood, and ability to care for others. Nutrition, sleep and exercise are the first line of defence against stress. They are also the first 3 things to go out the window when you're stressed out and overwhelmed.
Sleep matters. Rest matters. Especially in neurodiverse families.
Parenting often requires quick thinking and problem-solving, and when you're well-rested and mentally sharp, you're more likely to make thoughtful, effective decisions that benefit your family. Your executive function is stronger when you’re rested, too.
When you’re physically healthy, you have more stamina for the demands of parenting. Your ability to play with your children, take walks, and engage in activities as a family is significantly enhanced. Plus, when your children see you prioritize your health, it sets a positive example for them to follow.
Parents, your spiritual wellness matters. Here are 3 ways to boost spiritual wellness.
When you have parent guilt you feel like you’re not giving your best as a parent or not making the best decisions for their wellbeing. You are not alone. Remember God (or your higher power) is with you. As a parent, focus on nurturing your own sense of peace and purpose by dedicating time to spiritual self-care. You enhance not only your inner well-being but also your capacity to navigate life's challenges with grace and resilience. This also fosters an environment that encourages your child’s spiritual growth.
Practice Gratitude.
God has given us the strength to do a lot of things well, including being a parent. Cultivate gratitude and remember all you have overcome and lived through. Make a list. It allows you to remember the SUPERHERO parent you are. Be intentional about cultivating a daily gratitude practice. Gratitude fosters a positive outlook and enhances spiritual awareness.
Cultivate relationships and experiences that nourish your spirit.
Connect with the community by joining groups or attending gatherings that align with your spiritual interests, such as small groups, religious services or wellness retreats.
Give Yourself Grace.
As God gives you grace, give yourself with the same grace and forgiveness as you are on this journey of parenthood. Nurture your spiritual wellness by laying your burdens down on Him. No more pressure of perfectionism. He will take it all when you lay it down. Let your heart and spirit be at peace. His grace is sufficient enough.
By caring for your own emotional, physical and spiritual wellness, you are not only improving your own life, but you're also creating a healthier, happier, and more connected environment for your family. Self-care isn’t selfish, it’s the foundation that enables you to give more of yourself to others. By nurturing yourself, you can better nurture those you love.
Our neurodiversity affirming therapists can be an important part of your self care routine.
3 Ways Our Therapists Can Help You with Self Care
Read our therapists’ thoughts on self care on our neurodiversity affirming practice blog.
Make an appointment to customize your self care plan.
Attend weekly appointments to keep yourself accountable and get weekly support.
