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Treasure Hunt Parenting

Parenting Tips from a Marriage and Family Therapist in Kensington, MD.

Glennon Doyle said something recently on her podcast We Can Do Hard Things that really stuck with me. She was discussing parenting and what she wished she would have known during the early years.

The thing that stuck out to me as a Marriage and Family Therapist was seeing parenting as a treasure hunt.

Discovering the gems or hidden treasures of who your kid actually is. Versus who you expect them to be based on a number of things: your own desires, societal expectations, etc. I wish I could shout this from the rooftops! Please see your kid as they are!

It reminds me of a parenting, life-stages book that defined “growth" as reconciling expectations with reality. That’s it!  How amazingly simple. That’s how we grow. And yet it can be really hard to let go

You’ve always wanted a football player or a ballerina. A kid who aces the spelling bee. An artist who paints or makes amazing music. We especially wants our kids to be like us.

No judgement, it’s a very normal thing. All parents imagine and dream what their little ones will be like one day. It’s when these ideas obscure the real kid in front of us things start to go sideways.

Often we have to get out of our own way to let our most beautiful life unfold. It’s important to be aware of what standards we might be holding our kids too (even unwittingly!). Doing that self-exploration as a parent is vital.

If we can embrace learning about our children as they reveal themselves our relationships will be that much richer. Relating to your child is a lifelong journey and sometimes we might not know everything. Being open to new ideas and continually learning is the first step.

Parenting doesn’t come with a guide book or a manual. If we’re humble enough to realize there are things we don’t know and reach out for help, whether through a book, support group,  or therapy even I can honestly tell my client they’re going to be fine.

Admitting we need help is actually a sign of psychological health!

Our Family Counselors are here to help.

If you’d like help discovering the treasures within your child, see how parenting support can help you. If you have any questions, contact us here. Happy treasure hunting!