You Might Be Parenting with ADHD if...
You have a child with ADHD. A Maryland therapist explains how to tell if you might have ADHD too. And how it can help your parenting.
ADHD has a genetic component. That means it runs in families. Simply put, children with ADHD nearly always have at least one parent with ADHD.
But many parents with ADHD don’t know they have it! This is because most teachers in the 1970s and 1980s didn’t know the symptoms of ADHD. Instead, kids with ADHD were often described as “not living up to their potential.” That brings us to the first sign.
You grew up thinking you were lazy, or “not living up to your potential.”
As an adult you likely still have that nagging voice in your head. It tells you you’re not doing enough. Or should be able to do it better.
That’s because you are full of great ideas, but your intentions and actions don’t line up. You can imagine your accomplishments in great detail. But struggle to make them a reality. And it’s not your fault. This is the nature of ADHD.
Your kids really like you.
You read that right. Parents with ADHD can be a lot of fun. This is because people with ADHD live in the “now.” Parents with ADHD are often better at playing with their kids in the moment.
They may dive into their child’s hobby with them, rushing out to the store to buy supplies. Or may get as excited about ice cream for dinner as the kids do. There is nothing wrong with that!
ADHD Therapists in Maryland will tell you: ADHD is a superpower!
Managing the details of kids’ schedules and assignments (or keeping track of their stuff) is overwhelming.
You may be solving this by letting the other parent handle it 100%. If that’s the case, you might not notice your overwhelm. But you might notice you partner’s. The partner of an ADHD parent often takes on too much responsibility. And it leaves them tired and cranky.
Your partner gives you instructions or prepares the materials for your parenting tasks.
As we mentioned above, partners of ADHD parents are tempted to take on too much. Your partner might try to “help” by laying out the gear when you’re taking your child to soccer practice. Or give you step by step instructions for things you can probably figure out on your own.
You might appreciate this help. Or it might feel controlling. This pattern causes a lot of conflict for couples with ADHD.
Fighting with your partner about parenting tasks? A Maryland therapist can help you tell if it’s ADHD.
Your kids are scared that you’ll be late to pick them up.
Kids are smart. They know that you’re often “in the moment” and not planning the next task. Not thinking ahead, especially with DC traffic in the mix, can lead to late pickups. Your child may worry excessively that it will happen again.
This post is already too long for you.
It’s hard to stay focused on a long blog post. To keep it ADHD-friendly, we’ve moved the “what to do about it” to part 2.